Thanks Muchly
Have a great weekend.
So I have booked my flight to Jamaica for 3 weeks to go and visit family. I am looking forward to the trip because I need the vacation, but I am also slightly dissapointed because I was hoping to be about 20 pounds lighter. But I've shed 2 pounds in the last week and if I can keep eating healthy and continue at 3 days minimum in the gym per week I am confident that I can attain at leastt a 10 pound weight loss by the time my flight takes off on March 26.
I am dissapointed in the way some people treat me. I am not a confrontational type of person so it hurts my feelings when people say insensitive things to me regarding my weight or appearance in general. What do you say to someone who calls you a "fass ass" friend or not? I can take a joke once ina while but constantly it hurts my feelings and I have to maintain this outward appearance that it doesn't hurt my feelings but inwardly I'm like, 'whoa, am I only the size of my ass or hips?' There's so much more to me but yet 'regular' sized people judge me completely by the way I look. I am having a sensitive moment right now. I don't feel beautiful, I don't feel confident, I'm tired of society always telling me I need to be lighter complexioned and a smaller waist and lighter in weight. I want to be comfortable no matter what size I am and have people appreciate me for who I am and what I do and what I contribute rather than just the size of my pants. *sigh*
What a messed up vbalue system we have. I bust my ass everyday, I am polite and hard working yet I get little to nothing back. Sorry I am "whining" like this but I am just wondering, when is everything going to finally fall into place for me? When am I going to be happy with the person i've become? When are my accomplishments going to be acknowledged and when, dera Gawd when will people judge me on my accomplishments/morals/ethics rather than the colour of my skin and weight?
Gahhhhhh anyways I;m outtie. My ISP and/or internet connection is still giving me problems with connecting to bravejournal soooo I'll update ina while.
Amanda